Peter went into the test of Tales from the Borderlands 2 hoping for a fun adventure, but ended up just slapping his forehead in frustration.
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The universe is a bastard and I hate its humour.
Because this test was originally meant to be a fun break from the editor”s daily routine. Finally testing a game myself again instead of just counter-reading articles by other writers – delightful. Especially since New Tales of the Borderlands is the sequel to a game that I thoroughly enjoyed in 2015.
It sounded like a relaxed test for in between, a bit of a grin, a bit of a laugh, no big deal. I should have known: It sounded too easy. Because when I finally got to play New Tales from the Borderlands, the universe smacked me full in the face with an open hand. Ouch!
In this article you”ll learn why New Tales from the Borderlands, while not strictly speaking a really bad game, is still a huge disappointment for me. Because playing through this interactive film almost caused me physical pain.
In one respect much better than part 1
Unlike Tales from the Borderlands, Part 2 was no longer made at (now defunct) Telltale Studios. Instead, an internal team from Borderlands creator Gearbox took over the development. At least in one respect, this has had a positive effect: New Tales from the Borderlands stands on a much more stable technical foundation than its predecessor.
The combination of Unreal Engine and Gearbox graphics easily surpasses anything Telltale has put together in the past. Textures are sharp instead of coarse, there are subtle lighting effects and the faces are expressive.
There is also a clear leap forward in the animations. Nevertheless, the typical Borderlands style remains with thick black borders and bright colours. There are also no noticeable jerks or strange hangs during scene transitions: everything is just fine.
Unfortunately, that”s about the most positive thing I can say about New Tales from the Borderlands.
Broken and aimless
The game”s story revolves around three protagonists: scientist Anu, pickpocket Octavio and frozen yogurt seller Fran. The trio must make their way on the planet Promethea, where heartless corporate soldiers, ancient Vault aliens and crazed psycho bandits are out to get them. And … well, somehow that was it, because I searched in vain for a really strong conflict or a thrilling mystery at the heart of the story in the test.
Instead, the roughly eight-hour plot plods along at first, then has a big climax (at least in theory) and then slams on the brakes again. Strange: Although New Tales form the Borderlands is a complete game and you don”t have to wait for the release of further story episodes like Telltale, Gearbox also uses an episode structure.
However, the five sections of the story seem insufficiently connected, especially the middle section sags sharply. Suddenly, the trio of heroes must pitch for a cash injection in front of a live audience at an investor show and found a company, while an invasion is supposedly raging in the background.
Such harebrained twists and turns also existed to a lesser extent in the predecessor, but it had two advantages: It had sympathetic heroes and was consistently funny. Both are only found in part 2 in rudimentary form.
A lack of wit and sympathy
It”s not that I didn”t laugh during the testing of New Tales from the Borderlands. Often it was just a smirk or a coy grin, but I can confirm: Some of the gags in the game do hit home. Unfortunately, there are far too few.
What is striking is that the best jokes and funniest situations are connected to the illustrious side characters you meet on your journey. After all, that”s the old Borderlands identity somewhere, that in this crazy vision of the future all kinds of wacky guys hang out, one weirder than the other.
There”s assassin bot Lou13, whose surprising headshots are just as accurate as his dry comments. Or the enemy soldiers of the Tediore corporation, who have some of the most inventive scenes to themselves. But these short interjections are always countered by long stretches in which mainly the three heroes talk.
Only scientist Anu, with her mixture of absent-mindedness, altruism and sheer panic, was able to win me over to some extent. Octavio and Fran, on the other hand, remain aloof for a long time and bob around on the sympathy barometer far below the four protagonists from Tales from the Borderlands.
At least one of them (Rhys) makes a guest appearance, by the way, and in fact he is immediately far more interesting to watch than the actual heroes. Marcus from the Borderlands series also appears as a narrator, but he only summarises the events between the episodes, which now makes no sense at all, after all, the game can be played through directly in one piece without any waiting time between episodes.
The aimless story exacerbates the problem by constantly jumping back and forth between Anu, Octavio and Fran, especially in the first episode. There is hardly any time to develop a feeling for the characters. Later on, there are absurd scenes in which the trio makes some extremely questionable decisions, thanks to which I can no longer identify with the three of them. Also because, despite all the propagated freedom of choice, I have no choice but to follow the story along the lines laid down by Gearbox.
Linear and playfully flat
The few decision moments (a maximum of two per episode) hardly matter in the grand scheme of things, and the effects are limited. Only the end of the story changes slightly. Supposedly, it is important how the three protagonists relate to each other, for which a so-called team coordination value is even calculated after each episode. In practice, however, this does not play a role.
Gearbox has followed Telltale”s example in New Tales from the Borderlands and built countless quick-time events into the game. These can also be switched off completely in the options menu, but they are virtually the only gameplay aspect, because otherwise you simply passively follow cutscenes or choose from four answer options under time pressure. At a handful of points in the game you are actually allowed to explore a location on your own, but you don”t need to expect any real puzzles: You simply click on all the interactive objects until you move on.
Gadgets like Anu”s tech glasses or the (skippable) hacking mini-game are meaningless and are sometimes even undermined by the game logic: although I have just scanned a frozen NPC with the tech glasses and registered his vital signs, Anu asks in the following cutscene, startled, whether the man is dead. Well, it was worth studying!
Actually, however, this should not have surprised me: Anu”s preferred method of repairing technical devices is to hit them twice with his fist. There”s even a stupid mini-game for that. Meanwhile, collecting money in the course of the game once again makes no sense at all, because you can only use it to unlock alternative skins for the three heroes.
The arena battles, in which you pit Vaultlanders minifigures against each other, are also absolutely grotty. This gameplay nonsense plays absolutely the same every time and doesn”t even have a hint of ambition – to this day I wonder who on earth is supposed to use the option in the main menu to play these stupid duels again for fun, apart from the story.
Dynamics? Not at all
I was really annoyed by some of the action sequences in the game. Because no matter how big the enemies are or how numerous, there is simply no tension at all. This is due to several factors, from the mostly absent music to the lame staging. The predecessor may have had choppy animations, but the pace in the battles was still realistically high.
Not so in New Tales from the Borderlands: the trio of heroes actually crouches for minutes (!) behind two crates to hatch a plan, while half a metre away the giant Vault monster waits dutifully, only occasionally snaking a shy tentacle in their direction.
As a gamer, I stared at the screen in bewilderment at that moment and wondered what on earth had possessed the authors to write such nonsense. I could (!) forgive such lapses in logic if New Tales from the Borderlands would do something with the absurdity of this situation.
Maybe the monster in the background is having a crisis of purpose because everyone is ignoring him. Or the heroes break the fourth wall with a pointed comment and wink at the player. But no, this scene (as well as many other similarly inane moments) is completely serious and thus drives me to despair.
Editor”s Verdict
Even though the review reads like this: New Tales from the Borderlands isn”t strictly speaking a bad game, it”s just completely mediocre. But with its focus on story and dialogue (gameplay is almost non-existent, as in the Telltale games), it weighs all the more heavily when the title fails in precisely these categories. No matter how good the technology is, stable frame rates and pretty lighting effects can”t make up for it.
I”m sure my great disappointment also has to do with the fact that I thought the predecessor was so good. But seven years later, I think I can also expect that the sequel won”t just keep me so-so. The effervescence, the humour, the delightful tall tales that Rhys and Fiona told each other – I look in vain for all of these in Part 2, or find only trace elements of them. What remains is a tired sequel that no one needs.
